TREVOR ON TREVOR

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The gullible parts of Trevor Lock interviews the slightly neurotic parts of him about his upcoming stand-up comedy show at The Box Office in Phnom Penh tomorrow, March 1.

Gullible Trevor Lock (GTL): So Trevor, what inspired the new show?

Slightly Neurotic Trevor Lock (SNTL): Two things mainly. One that happened a long time ago and one that happened quite recently.

. .

GTL: What was the thing that happened a long time ago?

SNTL: Well, when I was ill in hospital as a boy with concussion from playing cricket, I imagined David Gower stroking me through the covers.

GTL: What? Ah… ok. Is that a joke?

SNTL: Yes. Stroking me through the covers means two things.

GTL: Right. I get it. And what was the second thing?

. .

SNTL: Touching me through the blankets.

GTL: No.

SNTL: Hitting the ball through an area of the pitch on the off-side of the batsman.

GTL: No. What was the second thing that happened to you that inspired the new show?

SNTL: Oh, the discovery that my girlfriend, Nica, has been secretly pretending to be a man behind my back.

GTL: Really? OMG! That must have come as a big surprise?

SNTL: Yes, it was a big surprise. Although not as much as a surprise as you just saying OMG but still…

GTL: Sorry, I picked it up from my internet fans. ROFL!

SNTL: Right, nice humble brag there. Anyway, to answer your question – yes, it was a surprise that she’d been pretending to be a man but I wasn’t … shocked, you know? I was like, ‘yeah, that kind of makes sense actually.’ Not just because she’d been spending a lot of time on her own but because I could believe that she’d enjoy pretending to be men.

GTL: Men? So she’d been pretending to be more than one man?

SNTL: Yes, she’s been pretending to be several men over a period of months.

Trevor Lock – in both his gullible and slightly neurotic personas – will be at The Box Office tomorrow. Supplied

GTL: How did she pretend to be men?

SNTL: Different ways. Mostly when I wasn’t there. She’d dress up as a man and then go round town having these little masculine adventures all over the place. Caring about football, drinking different kinds of real ale, commenting on farts, obsessing over technology. Sometimes it would just be in her imagination. She’d just be sitting there quietly thinking about being a man. Often she wouldn’t even realise she was doing it. She’d have no idea she was daydreaming about being men. I’d have to tell her myself because she just wasn’t aware.

GTL: So you knew she was doing it?

SNTL: No, I had no idea.

GTL: But you just said…

SNTL: It wasn’t something I ever thought about. I guess part of me knew but at the same time I wasn’t ready to face it. I preferred to live in the reality where she wasn’t pretending to be men all the time. But then once you finally admit it to yourself that it’s happening. Once you let the thought in ‘my girlfriend is pretending to be different men’, then you can’t ignore it anymore.

GTL: So how did you find out?

SNTL: Katy Perry told me.

GTL: Katy Perry, told you?

SNTL: Yes.

GTL: Russell Brand’s ex-wife, Katy Perry?

SNTL: Yes. Katy Perry told me. In a dream. It was one of those dreams that are really life like and when I woke up I thought about it and it suddenly all made sense. So I confronted her about it. Not Katy Perry, Nica, my girlfriend. (Katy Perry still doesn’t know). Anyway, I confronted Nica and she immediately denied it of course and I suppose that’s when I knew it was true.

GTL: And this inspired your new show?

SNTL: In a word: yes.

GTL: In two words?

SNTL: Not really. The show’s a collection of different pieces by myself on various themes.

GTL: Nice.

Tickets are sold for $10 on the door, but you can get them for $7 if you book via email to [email protected]

 

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